She said I'm going out with my girlfriends
Margaritas at the Holiday Inn
Oh have mercy...my only thought
was tequila makes her clothes fall off

I told her put an extra layer on
I know what happens when she drinks Patron
Her closet's missing half the things she bought
Yeah, tequila makes her clothes fall off

She'll start by kicking out of her shoes
Lose an earring in her drink
Leave her jacket in the bathroom stall
Drop a contact down the sink

Them pantyhose ain't gonna last too long
If the DJ puts Bon Jovi on
She might come home in a tablecloth
Yeah, tequila makes her clothes fall off

She can handle any champagne brunch
Bridal shower with Bacardi Punch
Jello shooters full of Smirnoff
but tequila makes her clothes fall off

She don't mean nothin'
She's just having fun
Tomorrow she'll say
Oh, what have I done
Her friends will joke about the stuff she lost
Because tequila makes her clothes fall off

A list of things I have lost in the past few months [that I can remember]:

• 3 tongue studs
  
• 2 skirts
  
• 4 tops
  
• 2 pairs of shoes
  
• 1 single shoe, rendering the pair useless
  
• 6 bras/panties/thongs
  
• 1 earring
  
• 2 retaining balls for different pairs of captive bead earrings
  
• 1 purse plus all contents
  
• 4 cellphone handsets
  

*sighs*